[Atsushi has to actually think about it for a second.]
Well, besides Tiger... My only boyfriend who's explicitly said that we're boyfriends is Atsushi. But then there's Osamu, John, and the other Atsushi, and Ryuunosuke... Avicebron, Manuela. Inaba once. Colress I've moonlaced with once or twice, same with Nakahara and Kunikida... Dazai has a standing invitation to help with his Iris heats... Lucy and Nyuu... Lovecraft once. Jakob once, during Sanguis. Mikuni recently...
I think that's all of the people who are still here?
[It's even longer if he counts people who've gone home.]
Then... I think it's just you, the Atsushis, Ryuunosuke, Osamu, John, Manuela... And Lucy and Nyuu, or at least I don't feel right just calling them friends with benefits.
[Pulls out his phone-- hold on, it's not the same if he doesn't record it for Atsushi.]
And do you want to be with him? As his boyfriend-- or even more than that?
Because that's the thing with Atsushis. You have to be really direct with them, or they'll use whatever wiggle room they can find to assume the worst. So you should ask him directly.
...Even if I want to date him, I can't take him out on dates. Even if I want to call him husband like you do, I can't wake him up with kisses or hold him or do anything a husband would do.
I don't throw around words I can't back up with actions.
And you think Atsushi doesn't already know all of that?
[It's frustrating, because he has a point. What point was there to call it anything else? They didn't need to be dating to be in love. And being in love didn't mean they had to be dating.]
[But that doesn't mean they can't still want it. And it doesn't take being a genius detective to tell that they both do -- desperately. But unfortunately, even Ranpo has his limits. And as much as he's tried to help bring them closer, to bridge that gap that exists between them, this wasn't something within his power to fix.]
[And somehow, that hurts even more. Was it just cruel to have led them this far, knowing they'd eventually hit this roadblock?]
[Or maybe there were just some things he should led them handle on their own.]
[He tucks his phone back under his pillow and sighs.]
I'll talk to Atsushi about it in the morning, but-- could you be the one to sleep tonight? It's late, and I'm tired. I don't want to say anything stupid.
[Since right now-- he feels like he's just gotten Atsushi's hopes up for nothing.]
[And for someone like Ranpo, not being able to do something to help someone hurts in a different way, on top of knowing how much both of them must hurt, knowing they're so close, but still so far from one another.]
[Which is why he just nods, before laying down and curling up and pretending to sleep through the night.]
[...]
[He's still cuddling up with Tiger tho. He's sad, but he's also only human okay.]
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Atsushi.
[POKES HIS NOSE FOR EMPHASIS]
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So you're official now? That's good to hear.
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[Among other things, but ongoing threads are ongoing--]
[But on that note.]
...should we be talking about that stuff? It's not like I was keeping it from you. I just don't know if you'd wanna hear about it or not.
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[It's Ranpo, so he might already know already.]
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[Because it doesn't bother him at all -- if anything, he finds it a little exciting to talk about.]
[He just typically doesn't, since he knows at least some of his own partners are the more jealous types.]
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Well, besides Tiger... My only boyfriend who's explicitly said that we're boyfriends is Atsushi. But then there's Osamu, John, and the other Atsushi, and Ryuunosuke... Avicebron, Manuela. Inaba once. Colress I've moonlaced with once or twice, same with Nakahara and Kunikida... Dazai has a standing invitation to help with his Iris heats... Lucy and Nyuu... Lovecraft once. Jakob once, during Sanguis. Mikuni recently...
I think that's all of the people who are still here?
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[He wasn't expecting an entire fuck-list, but now he's grinning.]
Ehhh, Atsushi has almost as long a list as I do!
But I think I'd only count the people I go on regular dates with. Otherwise we'd be here all day.
[Since he absolutely did list everyone he's banged in Prisma back during the hot springs trip, but that list included a number of Prismals as well.]
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Then... I think it's just you, the Atsushis, Ryuunosuke, Osamu, John, Manuela... And Lucy and Nyuu, or at least I don't feel right just calling them friends with benefits.
It's still kind of long.
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[And surely between all of them, one of them is going to convince him of it!!]
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...Do you think Tiger and I are boyfriends? Atsushi said we acted married, but I don't really see how...
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You mean you two never talked about it?
Not even after he said he loved you at your birthday?
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[He was afraid of asking and being told 'no'.]
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Tiger, get out here.
[HE'S CLEARING THIS UP RIGHT NOW]
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[yeah hi]
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[JUST GETTING TO THE POINT]
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And do you want to be with him? As his boyfriend-- or even more than that?
Because that's the thing with Atsushis. You have to be really direct with them, or they'll use whatever wiggle room they can find to assume the worst. So you should ask him directly.
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It's not about whether I want to or not.
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[He lowers the phone.]
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I don't throw around words I can't back up with actions.
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[It's frustrating, because he has a point. What point was there to call it anything else? They didn't need to be dating to be in love. And being in love didn't mean they had to be dating.]
[But that doesn't mean they can't still want it. And it doesn't take being a genius detective to tell that they both do -- desperately. But unfortunately, even Ranpo has his limits. And as much as he's tried to help bring them closer, to bridge that gap that exists between them, this wasn't something within his power to fix.]
[And somehow, that hurts even more. Was it just cruel to have led them this far, knowing they'd eventually hit this roadblock?]
[Or maybe there were just some things he should led them handle on their own.]
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[He tucks his phone back under his pillow and sighs.]
I'll talk to Atsushi about it in the morning, but-- could you be the one to sleep tonight? It's late, and I'm tired. I don't want to say anything stupid.
[Since right now-- he feels like he's just gotten Atsushi's hopes up for nothing.]
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[Tiger will never hold a grudge over that.
He leans over and kisses Ranpo's forehead.]
Goodnight, Ranpo. I love you.
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[And for someone like Ranpo, not being able to do something to help someone hurts in a different way, on top of knowing how much both of them must hurt, knowing they're so close, but still so far from one another.]
[Which is why he just nods, before laying down and curling up and pretending to sleep through the night.]
[...]
[He's still cuddling up with Tiger tho. He's sad, but he's also only human okay.]
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It's still him when he wakes up, blearily rubbing the sleep from his eyes.]
Good morning. Did you sleep?
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