[He smiles and nods at that, before shuffling a few things around on the bed, tidying it up a little...! And then just dropping the whole box on the floor because why not, he's a messy creature. When he sits back up on the bed, he keeps his eyes cast downward, staring at his hands in his lap.]
...it's been a long time coming. Our friendship was the same way... we'd fight and argue over little things all the time. And even when the little things became bigger things, I just... put up with it. Because I loved her.
[There's something fundamental at work here. For all that Ranpo is in multiple romantic relationships, he's still absolutely inexperienced. If he weren't, it would have been more obvious from the start that this relationship was unhealthy.]
But... I need someone who can love me. And even if she did... she never really showed it.
[ He watches every movement the other man makes, though his eyes widen at the sight of that box just ... falling right onto the floor. For a moment, he feels badly for Atsushi, having to deal with this mess.
But he doesn't let that thought distract him. Ranpo needs his support, even if it isn't necessarily going to be the best. ]
Fighting and arguing doesn't necessarily mean a relationship is doomed from the start, but if she really never showed you how she felt, then ... I understand why you had to end it.
[ He's puzzled why it took so long, then, but perhaps Ranpo really doesn't know as much about relationships as he's let on. Even having ... however many he currently has. Kunikida admits that he really doesn't know the exact number.
He rests his hands in his lap and glances away as he asks: ]
What does this mean for you, then? How many relationships are you in, now? To be more precise, how many of your partners knew about the one you broke up with?
[ He's still very much used to 'one relationship is fine' as a standard, so he's not sure if everyone Ranpo dates needs to know something like this. ]
The thought of being in five relationships makes the blond's head spin, and he takes off his glasses to rub the bridge of his nose before he speaks. Glasses in his hand, he looks at Ranpo with focus, no barrier between their eyes at all. ]
Do you need some tissues?
[ He's not going to comment about how many people Ranpo is in a relationship with. It's not his place, and he believes his friend is handling them all well. But he can't help but comment about the crying in a helpful manner. It pains him to see the other man in such a state. ]
Or --
[ He shifts and quickly removes his vest. Handing it over to Ranpo, he smiles softly. ]
Here. Just use this. I don't mind.
Edited (forgot to change my icon) 2020-08-06 16:03 (UTC)
[Ah. It is cordis right now, and his emotions are more fragile than usual. Usually the moons put him in a bubbly and flirty mood, but when he's sad like this, it just magnifies whatever he is feeling. He'd be upset regardless, of course, but it's why the offer of Kunikida's own vest to wipe his eyes makes Ranpo tear up even more.]
[With a sniffle, he takes and buries his face into it, peeking up after a moment. It feels warm.]
[ Seeing Ranpo tear up a bit more after being handed his vest isn't quite what Kunikida expects, and so, he's rendered speechless for a few moments.
He inwardly worries that his gesture is too much, somehow.
The word of thanks allows him to relax, however, and he sets his glasses back on his face as he nods. ]
It's fine. Just return it when you can.
[ Awkward silence occurs again for a few seconds, as he thinks of what would be appropriate to say versus not. This is ... an admittedly difficult topic for him to provide guidance on. ]
Would you like if I stayed here for a little while? I finished enough lesson planning for tomorrow, I think. If anything, I can push a few lessons to next week if need be.
[ That, of course, is something he doesn't really like to do. But Ranpo means enough to him where he can make such sacrifices. ]
[More than just accepting his offer, he makes it a request. Kunikida's presence was calming and familiar, which is just the sort of stability he needs right now. But also, he wants to share this side of himself with one of his dearest friends. A side he always made an effort to hide back home.]
I know it's probably a little weird for you to see me like this. I didn't even let you see me cry after Fukuzawa-san was attacked by the viral ability user.
[His eyes were red, of course, but no actual tears were shed in front of the others.]
[ Others have seen Kunikida cry. Not many, but -- it's certainly happened. He sees no shame in it, but then again, he wouldn't comment if he did. The last thing Ranpo needs is to have a pillar of support pick fun at him.
With a nod, Kunikida scoots even closer and wraps his arms around his friend in a tight embrace. For a few moments, he doesn't speak; he feels no need to. But he does eventually decide to at least state that he has no intentions of going anywhere this evening. To give that extra bit of comfort in this trying time. ]
I won't go anywhere unless you tell me to. I'm assuming you have a spare bed, but if not, I'll sleep on the couch or the floor.
[Ah. The hug is exactly what he needed, and for a few moments, he just leans into it. This kind of comfort wasn't the sort he ever sought out back home, but here? Things were different.]
Come on, you won't have to sleep on the floor. You can just sleep in my bed.
[You know, since he and Atsushi are dating, and he usually sleeps in his bed instead of his own.]
[ Hugs aren't something the blond is particularly used to giving, but circumstances have called for one. He's beyond elated that this hug has seemed to help Ranpo feel a bit better, evidenced by how he smiles once he pulls back. ]
I appreciate that.
[ He really does, but if he had to sleep on the floor, he totally would have without question. ]
For now, do you need anything else? Would you like to talk about anything? I won't ask questions; I'll just listen.
...I don't know. Maybe talking it out will make me feel better.
I know I don't have to rationalize breaking up with someone. But I still feel pretty lousy for it. We were both yelling, and just... [He sighs] When I invited her over, it felt like she already knew in her head how things would go. She wasn't even trying to talk to me. Just... talking at me.
[...]
Which I guess I'm sorta doing to you right now, but-- see, I'm not trying to have a break-up with you, so that's different.
A relationship goes both ways. If you weren't being given something equivalent to what you were giving out, then I think you've made the right choice. I'm not simply saying that because you're a close friend of mine. I most likely would have done the same thing.
[ His expression falls slightly, then, as if he's worried he's saying too much. Even though he's holding true and not asking questions, he still fears that he's prying. ]
It's nice to hear that from someone else. It's hard not to feel like I was being selfish for wanting more.
[More so, perhaps, because he had other partners who do provide support when he needs it. But he tries not to see all his relationships as a single thing, acknowledging that he needs to give and take from them equally -- and he should expect the same in turn.]
Even now, it doesn't feel fair to say she didn't treat me well. I know she tried, but... it just felt like I was the only one trying to make us-- make her happy. Even when I wasn't.
For as much as I like living here... I've been through a lot of really hard times, too. And she was never really there for me when I needed her, unless I asked her to be. And even then...
[So many moments stand out in his mind. The incident in December, when he was in the hospital and she was baffled that he asked her to hold his hand, when he told her about his "death" and she tried to punch him and lecture him for being pessimistic about it, when he asked for a kiss to celebrate learning he was alive and she brushed him off...]
[ Ranpo is one of the few people here, in this city, that Kunikida can safely say he really trusts. He trusts the decisions that the older man makes, too, which means that even though this newly-severed relationship sounds as if it were doomed from the start, he's certain that Ranpo knew what he was doing. That originally, his ex did care about him.
He refuses to believe that Ranpo, of all people, would have missed that.
With a delicate pat of his hand against the older detective's shoulder, Kunikida nods. ]
I can't state whether she liked you or not, but I trust you. I trust that you wouldn't have been with her for as long as you had if you felt she didn't care.
[ He bites his lip, momentarily wondering about the times Ranpo needed her and had to ask her to be there. What sort of things did he go through? If the blond had any idea ...
Well, he most likely would let his emotions overtake him. He's supposed to be the strong one here, though, so perhaps it's better left unknown. ]
[Knowing that Kunikida still trusts his judgement, considering the mistakes he's made in the past, means so much to him. It's enough to bring a smile back to his face, even if his heart still isn't quite in it.]
I know you're right, but-- you know, I do have a blindspot. It's never one I had to deal with very much anymore at home, but when I was kid, I had a really hard time telling exactly how people felt about me.
Even now... it's hard to tell sometimes, what people really think about me.
[Which might just be a factor in why he comes off as insensitive to others' feelings. He can read and predict their actions, but he can't tell just how much or how little someone cares about him if they aren't keen on showing it.]
[Which is all the more reason he and Inaba just weren't compatible. Because she likely assumed she just didn't need to spell it out for him that she cared.]
[ He nods softly, though after he hears the part about Ranpo's inability to know how others feel, he stops. Eyes focus on the other's, and his lips tighten a slight bit.
He's not quite sure what to say; if anything, he too never quite knows what others think. ]
Unless someone outright expresses how they feel about you, it's very difficult to figure out. The last thing you would want to do is assume.
[ He takes a deep breath. ]
Even you, the one who I trust to deduce anything, should be told how others feel. I hope I've made it clear how much our friendship means to me.
[ Finally, his expression softens. ]
I know many people do love you and care for you, and have shown you the courtesy of telling you. Try not to let the ones who didn't or don't get to you too much.
Of course. The ones close to you should know that by now, I think. [ He certainly does; if anything, he clearly remembers the times Fukuzawa offered to praise Ranpo if he helped the Agency out. It's a last resort type of thing, but it always works. ]
I'm glad. If you ever need me for talks like this, you know where to find me. Or how to contact me. [ If he's at work, though, it'd better be an emergency! ]
[And with the heavy conversations out of the way, they proceeded to have a pleasant night that probably ended with Ranpo using those sad kitty ears to convince everyone to sleep in the same bed and cuddle him to sleep.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
...it's been a long time coming. Our friendship was the same way... we'd fight and argue over little things all the time. And even when the little things became bigger things, I just... put up with it. Because I loved her.
[There's something fundamental at work here. For all that Ranpo is in multiple romantic relationships, he's still absolutely inexperienced. If he weren't, it would have been more obvious from the start that this relationship was unhealthy.]
But... I need someone who can love me. And even if she did... she never really showed it.
no subject
But he doesn't let that thought distract him. Ranpo needs his support, even if it isn't necessarily going to be the best. ]
Fighting and arguing doesn't necessarily mean a relationship is doomed from the start, but if she really never showed you how she felt, then ... I understand why you had to end it.
[ He's puzzled why it took so long, then, but perhaps Ranpo really doesn't know as much about relationships as he's let on. Even having ... however many he currently has. Kunikida admits that he really doesn't know the exact number.
He rests his hands in his lap and glances away as he asks: ]
What does this mean for you, then? How many relationships are you in, now? To be more precise, how many of your partners knew about the one you broke up with?
[ He's still very much used to 'one relationship is fine' as a standard, so he's not sure if everyone Ranpo dates needs to know something like this. ]
no subject
If I'm dating someone, I'm going to tell them about my life, obviously. And I've already told some of them about it.
But... I guess I'm only seeing five people now.
[...]
[Reaches up to quickly wipe his eyes, u see nothing!!]
no subject
The thought of being in five relationships makes the blond's head spin, and he takes off his glasses to rub the bridge of his nose before he speaks. Glasses in his hand, he looks at Ranpo with focus, no barrier between their eyes at all. ]
Do you need some tissues?
[ He's not going to comment about how many people Ranpo is in a relationship with. It's not his place, and he believes his friend is handling them all well. But he can't help but comment about the crying in a helpful manner. It pains him to see the other man in such a state. ]
Or --
[ He shifts and quickly removes his vest. Handing it over to Ranpo, he smiles softly. ]
Here. Just use this. I don't mind.
no subject
[Ah. It is cordis right now, and his emotions are more fragile than usual. Usually the moons put him in a bubbly and flirty mood, but when he's sad like this, it just magnifies whatever he is feeling. He'd be upset regardless, of course, but it's why the offer of Kunikida's own vest to wipe his eyes makes Ranpo tear up even more.]
[With a sniffle, he takes and buries his face into it, peeking up after a moment. It feels warm.]
...thank you.
no subject
He inwardly worries that his gesture is too much, somehow.
The word of thanks allows him to relax, however, and he sets his glasses back on his face as he nods. ]
It's fine. Just return it when you can.
[ Awkward silence occurs again for a few seconds, as he thinks of what would be appropriate to say versus not. This is ... an admittedly difficult topic for him to provide guidance on. ]
Would you like if I stayed here for a little while? I finished enough lesson planning for tomorrow, I think. If anything, I can push a few lessons to next week if need be.
[ That, of course, is something he doesn't really like to do. But Ranpo means enough to him where he can make such sacrifices. ]
no subject
[More than just accepting his offer, he makes it a request. Kunikida's presence was calming and familiar, which is just the sort of stability he needs right now. But also, he wants to share this side of himself with one of his dearest friends. A side he always made an effort to hide back home.]
I know it's probably a little weird for you to see me like this. I didn't even let you see me cry after Fukuzawa-san was attacked by the viral ability user.
[His eyes were red, of course, but no actual tears were shed in front of the others.]
no subject
With a nod, Kunikida scoots even closer and wraps his arms around his friend in a tight embrace. For a few moments, he doesn't speak; he feels no need to. But he does eventually decide to at least state that he has no intentions of going anywhere this evening. To give that extra bit of comfort in this trying time. ]
I won't go anywhere unless you tell me to. I'm assuming you have a spare bed, but if not, I'll sleep on the couch or the floor.
no subject
Come on, you won't have to sleep on the floor. You can just sleep in my bed.
[You know, since he and Atsushi are dating, and he usually sleeps in his bed instead of his own.]
no subject
I appreciate that.
[ He really does, but if he had to sleep on the floor, he totally would have without question. ]
For now, do you need anything else? Would you like to talk about anything? I won't ask questions; I'll just listen.
no subject
I know I don't have to rationalize breaking up with someone. But I still feel pretty lousy for it. We were both yelling, and just... [He sighs] When I invited her over, it felt like she already knew in her head how things would go. She wasn't even trying to talk to me. Just... talking at me.
[...]
Which I guess I'm sorta doing to you right now, but-- see, I'm not trying to have a break-up with you, so that's different.
no subject
[ His expression falls slightly, then, as if he's worried he's saying too much. Even though he's holding true and not asking questions, he still fears that he's prying. ]
no subject
[More so, perhaps, because he had other partners who do provide support when he needs it. But he tries not to see all his relationships as a single thing, acknowledging that he needs to give and take from them equally -- and he should expect the same in turn.]
Even now, it doesn't feel fair to say she didn't treat me well. I know she tried, but... it just felt like I was the only one trying to make us-- make her happy. Even when I wasn't.
For as much as I like living here... I've been through a lot of really hard times, too. And she was never really there for me when I needed her, unless I asked her to be. And even then...
[So many moments stand out in his mind. The incident in December, when he was in the hospital and she was baffled that he asked her to hold his hand, when he told her about his "death" and she tried to punch him and lecture him for being pessimistic about it, when he asked for a kiss to celebrate learning he was alive and she brushed him off...]
...I still wonder how much of me she even liked.
no subject
He refuses to believe that Ranpo, of all people, would have missed that.
With a delicate pat of his hand against the older detective's shoulder, Kunikida nods. ]
I can't state whether she liked you or not, but I trust you. I trust that you wouldn't have been with her for as long as you had if you felt she didn't care.
[ He bites his lip, momentarily wondering about the times Ranpo needed her and had to ask her to be there. What sort of things did he go through? If the blond had any idea ...
Well, he most likely would let his emotions overtake him. He's supposed to be the strong one here, though, so perhaps it's better left unknown. ]
no subject
I know you're right, but-- you know, I do have a blindspot. It's never one I had to deal with very much anymore at home, but when I was kid, I had a really hard time telling exactly how people felt about me.
Even now... it's hard to tell sometimes, what people really think about me.
[Which might just be a factor in why he comes off as insensitive to others' feelings. He can read and predict their actions, but he can't tell just how much or how little someone cares about him if they aren't keen on showing it.]
[Which is all the more reason he and Inaba just weren't compatible. Because she likely assumed she just didn't need to spell it out for him that she cared.]
no subject
He's not quite sure what to say; if anything, he too never quite knows what others think. ]
Unless someone outright expresses how they feel about you, it's very difficult to figure out. The last thing you would want to do is assume.
[ He takes a deep breath. ]
Even you, the one who I trust to deduce anything, should be told how others feel. I hope I've made it clear how much our friendship means to me.
[ Finally, his expression softens. ]
I know many people do love you and care for you, and have shown you the courtesy of telling you. Try not to let the ones who didn't or don't get to you too much.
no subject
[Of course Ranpo "Praise Kink" Edogawa wants to hear how much his friends like him.]
[But there's an earnest smile on his face now, as he takes the opportunity to lean against Kunikida's shoulder.]
But-- thank you. I really do feel better, talking it all out like this.
no subject
Of course. The ones close to you should know that by now, I think. [ He certainly does; if anything, he clearly remembers the times Fukuzawa offered to praise Ranpo if he helped the Agency out. It's a last resort type of thing, but it always works. ]
I'm glad. If you ever need me for talks like this, you know where to find me. Or how to contact me. [ If he's at work, though, it'd better be an emergency! ]
/wraps this up!!
[And with the heavy conversations out of the way, they proceeded to have a pleasant night that probably ended with Ranpo using those sad kitty ears to convince everyone to sleep in the same bed and cuddle him to sleep.]